Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Randomize