You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
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