FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
