Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
