Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
