So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
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