Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Randomize
