So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize
