I must be too annoying 4 u.
is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Randomize
