Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize