just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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