i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
Randomize
