I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Randomize