I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
