some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
