i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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