His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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