I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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