so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
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