Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
She swung at the pinata with crutches
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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