I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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