I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Randomize
