Welp...herpes.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
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