Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
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