so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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