it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize