so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
