It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
