I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
I can't put those talents on a resume
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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