Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Randomize
