ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize
