Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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