...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
