Heybabeimwearingurpanties
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
Randomize
