Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Boobs are out for the taking
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
A bitchslap is in order.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
