oh god the rape fog is back!
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
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