dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
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