I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
high people should be assigned attendants
this boner is exhausting
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Randomize