I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize
