Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
