my vag is so smooth its legendary
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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