As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
So gin and wine won't be happening again
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
