YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize
