You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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