Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
