Sry I called you an 8
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Randomize
