question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
