At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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