Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize
