I hate all girls vehemently.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
